Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Why Abe Lincoln Was Lucky

This is a neat article, looking at why Lincoln was "lucky."  As a note, I think I'm actually going to go watch the new Lincoln movie in theaters.  I'll let you know what I think.  I hardly ever see "big people" movies in the theater so I'm excited! 

Anyway, back to this article, which talked about how Lincoln was "lucky" because he didn't have to work with modern media.  The article did a spoof that was pretty funny of what modern media on Lincoln might sound like:
“Tonight! New scandals as a desperate President Lincoln finds himself accused of moral degeneracy as his attempt to rewrite the Constitution is on life support—AND new details about the public and private hypocrisy of his radical allies. THIS….is the Vallandigham Report!

“We begin tonight with a shocking revelation of President Lincoln’s true moral character. In a just-obtained video shot during what he thought was a private conversation among cronies, the president was captured telling a joke involving a portrait of our beloved Founding Father George Washington hanging in the bathroom of a British aristocrat. We can’t broadcast the full audio, but in this coarse attempt at humor, the president of the United States employs a common barnyard obscenity—and then laughs at his own crudity! Bernie, as our media analyst what’s your reaction?”
“Clement, like every decent American, I’m appalled. I’m outraged. For our Head of State to resort to such language—well, it’s just unthinkable that such language could emerge from a president.”

“Thank you, Bernard. This latest stain on the president’s moral standing comes as we learn that the president has employed what can only be called blatantly dishonest language to conceal the fact that he is willing to prolong this Civil War in pursuit of his political goals. As we’ve been reporting, Francis Preston Blair, founder of Lincoln’s own Republican Party, has reached out to Confederate officials in search of a negotiated peace. When he was asked if such a group was in Washington—which would doom the 13th Amendment’s passage, the president said there is no such group in the capital and 'is not likely' to be here. What he didn’t say is that’s because he’s forbidden them to come here, according to our sources..."

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